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Mother Julia says yes to the shot, daughter Esmee no: “Do you want to see me later?”

It may sound too good to be true, but the special thing is that Julia and Esmee (their real names are known to the editors) do not get in each other’s hair about this. Even though the situation is difficult and the fear of the virus is great, they keep talking to each other. In this way they hope to be an inspiration. Because they both know families where things are not so peaceful when the discussion starts about whether or not to vaccinate.

Julia: ‘I couldn’t believe her decision at first’

“My daughter sent me a video in which an employee of the RIVM expresses her doubts and dissatisfaction about corona vaccine. I must tell you: I thought it was an extremely stupid and simple video. Esmee said she was not going to take the vaccine. angry and called her right away. “So because of such a movie you make that decision?”

“My daughter has an 11-month-old child. She does my shopping because I am vulnerable due to my chronic illness and I spend as little time outside as possible. She actually lives with me, but is now with her boyfriend most of the week,” also the father of her son. For fear that she will give me the virus. “

“That’s why I couldn’t believe her decision at first. All these months we go to such trouble. How much longer can I have my daughter and grandson close to me because of her decision?”

“My reaction shocked her. It was more than that one video, she said.” Mommy, I hope it won’t cause any problems between us. Would you like to see me if I don’t get vaccinated? “

“I have to see how things are going, I said. She was afraid that I would say that I wanted to distance myself. But I will not. The vaccination must be negotiable. Everyone is free to decide, to choose their own. make a choice. ”

Esmee: ‘Scary to decide now’

“When I heard that the first vaccine was out, I had my reservations and I saw that others had it too. Then I put it on the table: ‘Mom, are you going to do it? I don’t think I’m going to do it. unless more is known by the time it’s my turn. “

“I am also quite scared. I know it is a dangerous virus. When I come home to my mother, I consciously keep my distance. No kisses or hugs. I actually only go outside for shopping or a walk, very occasionally. a friend comes to visit. “

“But for me it’s: I am young, I have no underlying disease. I prefer to wait until we know more about those vaccines. They have developed so quickly. I find it quite scary to decide now while we are free. know little about it. “

Esmee: “I am not against vaccinations, I just have my son vaccinated. But the injections he gets have been going on for generations. I am not going to get vaccinated with something that may soon show that it has not helped. I will take care of that. I really don’t believe the far-reaching things I see on Facebook, but I am waiting to be told that it is certainly useful.

“My mother chooses to do it, who am I to say anything about it?”

“It is logical that she is afraid of the consequences of my decision. I have tried to reassure her: ‘If you take it you are probably reasonably well protected, then the chance is less than now that I will transfer it to you. Soon we will be able to see each other and you see your grandson more often. ”

“I hope that when people read this, they will think a little more carefully: let’s not argue about it and let people in their worth, you can’t make anyone else obligated.”

81 percent opt ​​for vaccination

The percentage of Dutch people who plan to be vaccinated is increasing and is now 81 percent, according to a poll by I&O Research (commissioned by the NOS). Of these, 63 percent said they would ‘definitely’ opt for vaccination and 18 percent ‘probably’. The group that did not want to be vaccinated (‘definitely not’ or ‘probably not’) fell to 11 percent. 8 percent answered ‘I don’t know’ or ‘I don’t know yet’.

This way you have a good discussion

How do you properly discuss your disagreement about vaccination? “Show interest and open up like an OEN – Open, Honest and Curious,” says Bernadette Keijzer, family mediator, conflict coach and owner of Hello Mediator.

For example, someone who wants to get vaccinated starts the discussion:

  • Show interest: what makes you not want to vaccinate?
  • Listen…
  • Summarize: So if I understand you correctly, then you do not want to be vaccinated, because … (repeat what you have heard the other say)
  • Continue to ask: What is the worst that can happen if you do get vaccinated? Let the other person tell you, listen, summarize, and then ask the question: What is the worst that can happen if you do not get vaccinated?
  • Do not judge what the other is telling you, do not express an opinion and do not give advice
  • Ask if the other person also wants to hear your vision. Come up with objective criteria and explain why you want it. End with: I hope you change your mind, but I respect your choice
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