Times change and luckily. There are those statements that our parents used to use, but that you really wouldn’t want to hurl at your child’s head now.
But of course everyone escapes one from time to time… In a reflex.
Things that parents used to say
Do you remember the most celebrated statements made by parents? If not, check the list below. A number of them are recognizable. You heard them pass by once every week, but most of the time you couldn’t whistle with them. Let alone understanding the context of some sentences. An editor asked around, including in the circle of friends, and came up with no less than nineteen ‘famous’ statements by parents.
1. “Close the door behind you, you weren’t born in the church, were you?”
I heard that at least once a day. So I closed that door again, because yes: I was born in the hospital. But what the difference was with the church, I don’t know.
2. “Surely it is not a hotel here?”
I only really started to understand them when I was a student, went back home every weekend and parked there with a bowl of chips on the couch. But my parents were already talking about this statement when I didn’t understand it.
3. ‘Eat your carrots, it will give you good eyes’
I have been kicked very often and I still have glasses. So.
4. ‘Don’t look in the mirror too long, then your face will stay that way’
Scary. And no idea why my mother said that. She also said it when I did it around midnight. And so I still don’t dare look in the mirror when I hear the church bell strike twelve o’clock. Imagine.
5. “Hey, the money isn’t growing on my back anyway”
Often heard in the toy store. Or on vacation. Or well, in a lot of places actually.
Parents and questioning children
6. ‘Children who ask are skipped’
‘Why?’ I sometimes tried to ask about this statement, but for the answer of my mother I refer to point 8.
7. ‘Hungry? The children in Africa are just hungry ‘
“But I’m hungry!” You are hungry. Not hungry. And then there was this answer and the stocking was done.
8. ‘Why? Why are bananas crooked’
And so I have never actually got a good answer for a lot of urgent, pressing, valid why questions.
9. ‘What now, hey? Hey, they make it besseme ‘
This one is Limburgish. Besseme, that means: brooms. So: they make brooms from hay. So when I yelled, “Hey Dad, can I watch TV?” I always got that answer first.
10. ‘When the clock strikes twelve in Rome, you keep your eyes squinted’
This was often used at a friend of mine at home. No idea what this is about, but probably something like point 4.
Full trunk on vacation
11. ‘Better shy than shy’
And so we dragged our entire household effects on vacation. Because you never know when you need something.
12. ‘Kan-no is in the cemetery and wil-no is next to it’
Also just about. Don’t whine, but brush. That work.
13. ‘I don’t like that? Loops are on the buses’
So you just ate it. Especially those roots. Because that gave you good eyes.
14. ‘If you don’t listen now, then there is something black’
Strange, I heard that more often than my sister. I was always very afraid of that wave. But what exactly was it?
15. ‘The children in Africa would kill for it’
And so I gnawed away those sprouts and chicory.
16. ‘Scabs give you breasts’
A much-held statement in the family of a good friend. Judging from her façade, she always ate those crusts obediently.
17. ‘Whoever wants to be beautiful must suffer pain’
Good heavens, how many times I have not heard that. If shoes were not comfortable. If I had hair pain from a tight tail. It didn’t exactly make me more beautiful at that moment.
18. ‘Milk is good for everyone’
Yes, who hasn’t grown up with it? With that white motorcycle?
19. There is a time to come and a time to go. And that of going has now come.
So, there isn’t a nicer ending to this piece, right?
Many couples walk through the lockdown on their gums: alone on vacation
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